


The Space Between

by DSJWinchester



Category: Warrior (2011)
Genre: M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2011-09-25
Updated: 2011-09-25
Packaged: 2017-10-24 01:03:28
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 12,666
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/257118
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/DSJWinchester/pseuds/DSJWinchester
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>After the movie Corporal Mark Bradford goes looking for Tommy Conlon to give him a proper thank you.</p>
            </blockquote>





	The Space Between

**Author's Note:**

> This was unbeta I am sorry in advance for all mistakes. This was write really for me and a friend but I decide to share. Reviews are always welcome.  
> Peace

The spaces between

The Sparta fight changed a lot of things for me. Or rather the aftermath of the fight did. I was official discharged. I had the option to reenlist I had been planning to do another tour until the last fight. There had been a feeling building inside me, a wild static charge that started when I saw the youtube video and knew it would match the face on the recon video. The charge got direction when the news caster made it clear that after the fight win or lose, Tommy, the man who save my life, my brothers lives was going to be court martial possible doing a long stretch in jail. I spoke in his defense at his court martial. He would have done serious jail time but his lawyer paid for by his brother brought in a shrink who spoke to his state of mind, the death of his best friend under friendly fire, the death of his mother, his father alcoholism in his childhood, the fact that even in his flight state of mind he stop to save fellow marines. He got off six month jail time. I got out the marines with no real plan beyond find Tommy. My only goal was find him and tell him thank you to his face, not across a court room or on a video. I wanted to look him in the eye. It took work to find him. He didn’t go back to his father house but he didn’t go far. When I found him it took work to make him actual pay attention to me and then for him to understand that I wasn’t stay to show gratitude. I came to say thank you. I stayed because I fell in love. I couldn’t help it, falling for him, I fraught it till all the breath was gone from me. Then I gave in because there was no other option.

 

Now  
He presses down into me hand griping my hip pulling me back into his thrust, I bit the pillow cling harder to his forearm. He’s been fucking me for over an hour, in this position, me pressed face down into the bed him arching over me, he can last forever. He pushes down hard smashing into that spot, my dick is so hard it’s been trapped between my stomach and the sheet for an hour. We started with me on my knees, I ended up stretched out on the bed Tommy looming over me pressing me into the mattress with ever shove of his dick in my ass, he puts his weight behind it, I bit harder on the pillow. He grunts and pulls back sliding out of me, smacking my ass he sits back on his hunches.  
“Over.”  
I roll on my back, open my eyes. He is watching me with the cocky smirk on his face.  
“Get back in me.”  
“You’re a cock slut.”  
“You made me this way.”  
He shoves his finger inside my stretching my hole, pulls my leg up rest it on his shoulder so he can watch himself finger fuck me it’s not enough, nowhere near enough.  
“’Tommy please.”  
He pushes my leg downward I wrap it around his waist, he moves forward shove back into me, I gasp, arch up into his downward slide. It’s good so fucking good, every fucking time. He gets a good grip on my hips and start moving hard deep thrust rubbing that spot on every inward push. I grab hold of his shoulders, slide my arms down over his back pulling myself up getting a sharper angle that drives him in deep, I grunt and curse it feels so good, there is begging a lot of begging. He drives in deep and I come hard eyes squeezed shut ass clinging tight around his dick and he keeps right on moving dick slide right back in deep, I fall backward into the bed he shoves a pillow under my ass to keep his angle and keep right on going.  
“Baby please.”  
He shakes his head leans forward and kisses me, licks my mouth open swallows all my pleads. I cling to his neck making him stay there arched over me. I’m half hard, can’t believe I still have come in me. He shakes me off, rolls his shoulders sits back on his hunches dive in short, slower  
“No baby finishes please I want to feel you’re come inside me.”  
He is watching me, eyes focused and so there, I know he doesn’t give a fuck if I’m on the edge of death he is not ready to end this. He rolls his hip shallow short thrusts, my dick is hard again over full and sensitive I close my eyes bit hard on my lower lip.  
“You can last.”  
I nod, yes I can because he wants it. He’s pulling back slipping out of me, I open my eyes to watch him, he sits back scooting up the bed till his back is resting against the head board.  
“Come here.”  
“No baby I’m tired”  
“Mark.”  
I crawl up the bed straddle his legs, spreading my ass cheeks, he guides his dick into me just the head. I look down meet his gaze as I sit back on his dick. I shudder hard because I’m dying. I’m to fucked out for this.  
“Go on get it.”  
I rock down lift my hips up and drop down. There is no way I can ride him till he comes my thighs are all ready trembling. He grabs hold of my ass and rock me forcing me up and down. I clutch his shoulders trying to get a hold of myself, I can’t ,he pushes upward smashing into that spot, it so good it hurts, I am crying, I’m fucking crying it’s too good, hot deep bruising inside me. I lean forward give him most of my weight, give up on doing more than rocking my hip I press my face into his shoulder let him shove into me. I suck hard on shoulder, reach there between us and jerk my dick, I bit hard on his shoulder he grunts and shove in harder, he’s getting close. I clinch my ass tight and shift just enough rocking down to meet his thrust. He growls, smashes into my ass he can’t come like this.  
He shoves me off, I move fall backward on to the bed, he gets on top of my dragging my legs upward shoves in, I cry out, rock up into his next downward thrust and this is too good, I jerk myself hard tug almost painful on my dick. I’m coming, he’s fucking me deep hard, he’s close so fucking close, I clinch my ass and push up, his head snaps back his eyes close, he growls, short thrust and he is shooting in my ass. I drag the sheet over my face, he jerk in a few more times, than he is falling on top of me pulling the sheet away from my face, he’s smiling, bright, happy, God I love him.  
“4 times.”  
“You killed me.”  
“You said you couldn’t do more than three and the third time you didn’t even need a hand.”  
“You broke me.”  
He shifts almost soft inside me, I reach out press a hand to the back of his neck and pull him down, he comes easy kissing me greedy and deep. He draw back sliding out of me, swallows my groan at the lost of him. He rolls us till I’m spread out over him runs his hands down over my back to grip my ass in his big hands.  
“Your mouth is too fucking sweet.”  
“Shut up Connelly.”  
“It’s true you know it, your sweet mouth and your pretty pretty eyes.”  
I bit his shoulder, he laughs. This is a good day.  
“You know what we should do now.”  
His voice sounds sex rough, perfect. I press a kiss to his shoulder, he rubs my lower back fingers pressing in just a little.  
“What should we do?”  
“We should make breakfast.”  
I turn my head just enough for me to read the time on the clock.  
“it’s not even fully 6 in the morning we should go back to sleep.”  
“We’re up already, day started.”  
“You just fucked me for over an hour I deserve a nap.”  
He laughs and pushes me off him sitting up. “I’m starving.”  
He already moving, climbing out of bed pulling on his short. I roll on my side and watch him, roll his shoulders shift his weight stretches his arms than legs.  
“Tommy.”  
He gives me a smile and walk out the door. I groan. Press my face into the pillow. It’s my fucking day off I want to sleep with Tommy curled around me. I sit up ignoring the burn in my ass the ache in my legs. I rub my hip there is a bruise there, a Tommy shaped bruise. I press against it enjoy the sharp stinging of pain.  
“Mark get your ass out here.”  
I roll my eyes and pull on my short .  
“Now Corporal.”  
“I’m coming asshole.”

I walk into the kitchen he already has pots and pans out dragging bacon out the freezer, the waffle maker is out.  
“We are making real breakfast.  
“Yes.”  
“Fine move over you suck at waffles.”  
I’ve never done anything like this before, set up house with someone and just live life. I moved from my mom’s house to Tommy’s house. I don’t tell him that. I don’t tell him a lot of things, like our first time together was my first time with a man. He would take it the wrong way. He would take it as part of the gratitude thing, really I just never had the guts before him to actual go thought with the full on gay sex thing. Tommy makes me want with everything in me, he thinks it’s all about him saving my life.

 

Than  
I rest my hand on the table. I’m not sure what to do with them. Tommy just sits there watching me hands in the pocket of his jacket. The waitress comes back with our drinks. I offer her a smile Tommy glances at her gives her a smile and turn his gaze back to me. I swallow half my soda in one go. This had been a stupid idea.  
“I saw your thank you video last year. I heard you defense in court. I get that you are happy to be alive, why are you here.”  
I finish off the rest of my soda. I could use a glass of water.  
“Why are you here Mr. Bradford.”  
“I just wanted to meet you.”  
He looks at me, just looks at me than nods, his hand slides out of his pocket, he reaches for his drink takes a small swallow, I try not to look at his lips, he has gorgeous lips, cock sucking lip, I turn and look for our waitress, I wave my hand she smiles and come over.  
“Can I help you boys?”  
“Can I have another glass of water?”  
“Coming right up sugar”  
She walks off with a sway in her hip. I look at my hand, at the fork, knife, anywhere but his face. I look across the table at his hands, there are good hands, strong hands.  
“So you found me. When are you due back on base?”  
“I’m not. I didn’t re enlist.”  
“Why.”  
“I didn’t know how long it would take to find you.”  
“So what are you going to doing?”  
I shrug, shift around the spoon and the fork.  
“I’m staying in a hotel right now I’m thinking of down grading to a motel to save some money. I could go back to Tennessee I guess, move in with my mom get a job I was think college but I’m not sure now.”  
He shifts in his seat. I glance up he’s looking off toward the door face unreadable. He rests his hands on the table palms down fingers spread.  
“You are a pretty stupid kid.”  
“No I’m actual a very smart kid who had scholarships to four of the top 50 school in the US and I turn them down to join the corp.”  
He turns to look at me he gives me a crocked smile that tightness my gut.  
“Like I said stupid. You can stay with me if you want, free of charge until you decide to move back home and go to school.”  
“I might not move back home.”  
“It's what you should do.”  
The waitress, Ana comes back with my water. I take the glass and thank her she walks off. He watches her go with no real interest.  
“How long where you looking for me.”  
“7 weeks.”  
“You must not have been looking hard enough.”  
“I was looking hard, just not in the right places.”  
He sits back frowning. ”Where the fuck is my food.”  
I bit my lip to keep from laughing. I look around the restaurant and spot Ana coming towards us with a try. “It ‘s right there.”  
He glances over his shoulder and watches Ana make her way to us. She slides the double cheeseburger and fries in front of him and the cheeseburger in front of me.  
“You boys tell me if you need anything else.”  
I give her a smile. He nods and offer her a thank you, she leave us to our food.  
We eat. He doesn’t talk at all. I have no idea what to say so I chew my burger. When we are done Ana comes by he smiles and asks for the cheek. She rests it on the table and walk away.  
He reaches for the black pad pulling it to his side of the table. “I’ll take care of it.”  
That is not what I had been expecting.“You don’t have to.”  
“But I am.”  
He opens it reads the price and takes out his wallet. I watch him count out the money and put it on in the pad. He rests it on the table and looks at me with that hyper focused look, I swear goosebumps break out on my arms.  
“Do you know where I live.”  
“I have the address yes.”  
“You can come by any time after 8 I’ll be there.”  
“Umm thank you I don’t.. ..you don’t have to do this.”  
“Stop stating the obvious.”  
He gets out the booth, shoves his hand in the pocket of his jacket and walks away. I sit for a moment staring at the table trying to steady my thought..

I go back to the hotel and pack up my stuff. It’s a little after 4 I have a lot of time to kill. I sit on the bed flip on the TV. There nothing on. I lay back in bed trying not to think about his mouth, his hands, the too focused looks. I give up and pull off my pants I lay on my back close my eyes and let all the images come. I don’t take long. I lay there for a while after, come drying on my stomach thinking about his eyes how they are so full and so empty, how that doesn’t make any sense but it’s the only thing that can be true.

 

Now  
I get the eggs out of the fridge, he shifts me to the left reaching around me to get the peppers off the lower shelf, he stands up presses a kiss to the back of my neck. I close the fridge. I crack the eggs. He chops the peppers and drop them in the bowl I whisk them. I make the waffle batter, he set it in the waffle maker. I get a plate he put the finished waffles on the plate. While he makes waffle I make the eggs. I slide them on to a plate and then make the bacon. I put all the pots it the sink and hop up on the counter, he hands me a pale and fork and comes to stand in between my legs. I kiss him because I can than feed him a mouthful of eggs.  
Three years almost four really and we have yet to actual get chairs for the kitchen. He give my legs a squeeze I eat a bit of waffles.  
“We should get chairs.”  
He shakes his head leans in and licks syrupy off my mouth.  
“We don’t need any fucking chairs.”  
I laugh and feed him a mouth full of waffles.

Than  
I wait till 8 to leave. When I get to the small house at the end of a log row of houses all the light in the front are off. It’s only 8:45. I shoulder my bag and think about knocking. I found him mission accomplished, I could go home now. I lift my hand and ring the bell. I stand and wait. It’s a while before the door opens. He stands framed in the door way shirtless and bear feet. This was a stupid idea.  
He steps back, waves me in. I step into the dark hall. He closes the door and leads me down the hall to the back of the house. We step into the kitchen it’s a nice space the only room with the light on; there is a breakfast isle, smooth counter shiny silver appliances and no chairs. I rest my bag on the floor, he squints at me from by the fridge.  
“You want a beer.”  
“Yes that would be awesome.”  
He swings open the fridge takes out two beers, hands me one.  
“Come I’ll so you my guest room Tess said I need one so she made one.”  
I laugh he gives me a half smile and leads me out the kitchen back down the long dark hallway, up the steps, down another dark hallway, he stops suddenly, I almost bump into him, he pushes open a door.  
“This is the bathroom. It’s mostly yours, I don’t really have visitor, my room has its own bathroom.”  
“Um okay.”  
He start walking , he stops again pushing open another door, flips on the light  
“This is the guest room stay as long as you want, my room is at the end of the hall.”  
He turns and leaves the room and that is it. I drop my bag on the floor, close the door and sinking down in to the bed. This was the dumbest thing I have done. I unpack my stuff and head to the bathroom for a shower and shave.  
The bed is comfortable, I turn on the TV and settle in for another sleepless night.

I fall asleep without realizing it. I wake up screaming, my heart racing convinced I’m drowning. There is an arm around my shoulder holding me against something warm and solid, a hand warm against the side of my face, I try to catch my breath because there is a soft forceful voice telling me to breath. I struggle to move away, the hold is to strong, the hand on my face is so warm. I let the arms pull me close, the voice order me to breathe with them. I breathe, inhale, exhale, air fills my lungs. I remember where I am who, the solid present at my back is.  
“I’m sorry.”  
“It’s fine. You oaky?”  
“Yes I need water, I just something to drink.”  
“Okay.”  
He helps me out of bed. I shake him off; run a hand over my face trying to clear my mind.  
“I’m okay.”  
“Let go get water.”  
He walks out the room I follow down the not so dark hallway to the kitchen. The sun is almost up, he gets down two glasses and get me water from the sink. I drink it in one gulp, he pours me another glass and one for himself. I drink the second glass slower.  
“I don’t always have nightmare.”  
He shrugs.” It happens to the best of us.”  
I finish off my water. He’s looking at me, I fight back a shiver. I have never been this hyper aware of another persons in my life not even in the middle of a fire fight.  
He finishes off his water. “Do you want to come running with me, it helps.”  
I look away from his too focused gaze “A run sounds awesome.”  
“Meet me out front in 10.”  
I nod not bothering to answer, my throat still feels dry. We go back upstairs. I strip, ignore the rumpled bed and dress in sweat and my corp. tee shirt. I go to the bathroom wash my face, brush my teeth, I think about shaving but decide to do it later. I grab my water bottle from the room and head back to the kitchen, fill the bottle and head out front.  
He’s already there doing stretches on the front lawn. I join him he waits till I’m done before taking off at a steady pace. I follow him down the block. We run for an hour. When we get back to the house the sun is up. We go to the kitchen and dig around for food, he has cereal and milk so we eat that leaning against the counter.  
“I have to go see Brandon today you have any plans.”  
I shake my head talking around a mouth full of cereal. “not really, looking for a job.”  
“Computer is in the office, the offices is down the hall you can find it. The paper will be here in 15 minutes. If you want to go out and do some recon let me know so we can figure out the key situation.”  
He drops his bowl in the skin and walks off. I pour another bowl of cereal.

I stay in. I read the paper cover to cover spending extra time on the wanted adds, nothing fits. I get on the computer and do a local job search. Everything seems mind numbingly boring. I look at my bank account on line pay my cell phone bill and rethink mind numbingly boring. There is an open house for a sneaker store tomorrow at 2 pm. I might as well give it a go. I do up my resume and print it out. I spend the rest of the day eating cereal out of the box and watching YouTube videos, I video chat with some of my brothers still on active duty and with my blood brother back in Tennessee.  
It‘s a little after 5 when he gets back bearing food. He comes into the offices carrying a bag of takeout. He looks at the two boxes of cereal on the floor and the bottles of beer on the computer desk.  
“Productive day”  
“There is an open house for a sneaker store tomorrow at 2.”  
He nods and offers me the take out bag, I stand and grab it.  
“Do I have any cereal left?”  
“Another box.”  
He shakes his head and walks out the room . I follow him to the kitchen. It’s Chinese, real good Chinese food that we eat out the carton. I sit on the breakfast isle, he sit on the counter.  
“Why don’t you have chairs?”  
He shrugs. “Tess couldn’t find any that match before I moved in and I never got around it.”  
“Who is Tess?”  
He looks at me chewing his food. I give up on get an answer.  
“She’s my brother wife. She fixed up most of the house while I was in jail.”  
“That was nice of her.”  
He shrugs and puts the carton of rice down.“It’s not bad.”  
We don’t talk for the rest of the meal. When we are done, left over go in the fridge. he cleans up the kitchen, I clean up the office and go to the guest room.

I wake up the next morning knowing I had a terrible dream but I couldn’t remember it. I lay in bed looking at the wall. The sun is starting to come up when there is a bang on my door.  
“Yes”  
“Want to go for a run.”  
“Yes.”  
When I get out front he’s already doing stretches, he barely glances up when I join him. We run for over an hour when we get back to the house I’m winded and relaxed. We eat cold Chinese food for breakfast and go our separate way. I take a nap and wake around 10. I’m dressed and ready to go at 12:30. I knock on his bedroom door.  
“I’m heading out.”  
“Fine.”

I get the job at the sneaker store starting Thursday. When I get back to the house he is working out in the back yard. I join him. We eat take out for dinner. I go to bed early to stay out of his way and lay there looking at the walls.  
I’m already dressed the next morning when he knocks on my door. I hop out of bed and open the door. He gives me a slow look over and smirks, walks off without saying anything. We run for over an hour and come back home to nothing to eat so we shower and go to a diner he gets a big breakfast, I eat toast and eggs. We don’t talk. He doesn’t seem to talk much, ever. When we get back I call my mom because I know she must be going out of her mind with worry. I sit in the tree in the back yard and watch him work through stretches. I love the lines of his body. My mom ask all the obvious questions, how can I trust him, am I sure he is not a crazy murder, how much does the job pay, how long am I planning to stay, does she need to send me money. It takes 45 minutes to get her off the phone. I climb out the tree slide my phone in my back pocket and run across the yard. I poke him in the shoulder  
“You’re it.”  
He gives me a look and then he smack my arm  
“You’re it”  
And he is off running. I bit my lip to keep from laughing out loud and chase after him.  
We go to out for dinner and afterward we stop off in the store to get cereal milk and random food stuff. When we get back to the house I shower and go back to the guest room, there is a key sitting on the bed. I add it to my key ring.  
We run the next morning. I nap before dressing and heading out to start my first day of work.

 

Now  
We finish eating Tommy washes the dishes; I read the newspaper out loud. The phone rings I hop off the breakfast isle and grab it out the cradle before Tommy can touch it with his soapy hands.  
“Wash.”  
He gives me a look but goes back to the sink. I answer the phone.  
“Hello  
“Yes.”  
“”Mark, it’s Brendon.”  
“Hi.”  
I walk out the kitchen into the hall. “You are calling early.”  
“I figured you guys would be up. How is he doing?”  
“Fine so far but it’s early.”  
“You should bring him by we can help keep his mind off things.”  
“I might later.”  
“Or we could come by.”  
“No it better if we come over. You want to talk to him.”  
“Yes put him on.”  
I go back to the kitchen and pres the phone to Tommy ear without letting him touch it. He grunts into the phone. Brandon talks he listens, grunt a yes, than no, ask why and tell him to fuck off but he doesn’t look mad, he pushes the phone away  
“Talk to him.”  
I put the phone back to my ear. “What’s up.”  
“He agreed to come over for a barbeque.”  
“Really that was easy.”  
Brandon laughs. “That was a lot of talking.”  
“But no fighting back so it was easy. What time you want us to come over?”  
“3 ish sound good for you.”  
I look over at Tommy who is frowning down at the pot. “Yes, that works see you in a few.”  
“Bye.”  
I hang up, put the phone back in the cradle. Tommy puts the last pot on the dryer.  
“I know you are trying to keep me distracted from the date but I know what today is.”  
I shrug trying to look innocent. “We just want to give you options.”  
He leans across the space, brushing a kiss to my mouth then moves past me. The worst day of the year was the anniversary of the day his whole company died, the day Manny died. This is the third year I have been with him for the anniversary, the first was the worst, last year was bad but not horrible. I figure I could make this year decent it would never be a good day but decent was enough. I leave the kitchen and head up to our room. He is pulling the sheets off the bed.  
“You are going to do laundry.”  
He gives me a look that says I’m being silly. “No I was going to put this in the laundry bin and change the sheet, you can do fucking laundry.”  
“Asshole.”  
He tosses the sheets at me I catch most of it and stuff it in our laundry bin. I sit on the window seat and watch him make our bed.  
“Do you want to go for a run.”  
“I want you to stop fucking babysitting me.”  
“I’m not.”  
“You fucking are.”  
“Fine I am and I’m not going to stop. So do you want to run.”  
He tucks in the edge of the comforter. “Yeah let’s go running.”

It’s been over three years getting closer to four and I still don’t always understand Tommy but I get him, I know how to talk to him, how to not talk to him, to just be with him, to have whole conversations without saying a word, when to fight him and when to give in. I know how to love him, don’t know how to not love him, even when he’s pissing me off I love him.  
We run for 2 hours, fast pace. When we get back to the house I’m out of breath and thirst as all hell. I walk to the kitchen take the water bottle out the fridge I down half of it, Tommy comes up behind me pulls the bottle from my hand and drinks the rest, his arm comes around my waist, I rest back into his hold, he walk us backward kicking the fridge door close, pressing a kiss to the back of my neck suck on my shoulder his hand makes circle on my stomach.  
“No Tommy we are not having sex.”  
“You wanted to babysit me.”  
“Fuck you.”  
“Lets fuck.”  
“no.”  
He pushes me forward I brace my hands against the fridge, he pushes up my shirt, drops to his knee and yank my pants down, I feel his mouth hot against the inside of my thigh he sucks hard on the skin there just beneath my ass, licks upward, bites hard on my ass, licks the top of my ass crack. sucks on the base of my spin, I hate him.  
“Can we please not do this in the kitchen.”  
He doesn’t respond just nudges my legs further apart. I press my forehand to the fridge door, he slides a finger into my ass crack rubbing it around the rim, fuck, he leans in presses his tongue just there and pulls back, ass hole. I want it now, he knows that. I turn to look over my shoulder he’s considering my ass, hands resting one on each cheek to keep them apart.  
“Lube baby you are not fucking me dry.”  
“So bossy, I was getting there.”  
“Asshole.”  
He steps away from me, giving me room to turn around and face him, he is watching me with the greedy focused look that still gives me goosebumps.  
“Let go upstairs.”  
I nod, pull up my pants and follow him up to our room.

He’s in a playful mood, which I why 30 minutes later I’m on my hands and knees with his fingers and tongue in my ass. I press my face into the pillow and breath deep.  
“Fuck Tommy .”  
He twists his fingers just there, his tongue laps at the rim of my hole, I groan push my hips down and really I’m still not over being fuck open this morning. He smacks my ass and sits back, his fingers still rubbing just there. I know he is watching, he likes to watch the way my ass eat his fingers, his dick.  
“Do you think you could ride me till I come?”  
“Yes God please baby let me try.”  
He laughs, leans in and sucks on my ass then bites down hard, he licks at the bruise sucking on the skin. I groan my hips jerk downward. He pulls his fingers out my ass reaches down between my legs and gives my dick a jerk. He settles himself against the pillow and motions me to him. I lean forward and swallow his dick all the way to the base .  
“Fuck Mark.”  
He pushes in just that bit further, I don’t fight it, keep my throat open, he face fucks me in short deep thrush I hum around his dick, he tugs hard on my hair.  
“You are such a bitch.”  
I move down to meet his upward thrust sending him deep in my throat, he grunts and pull back tugging me off his dick.  
“I want in your ass.”  
I straddle his laps, he runs his fingers along the crack of my ass, his finger slip in once twice before he is guiding his dick in. I rock back slowly till he’s buried all the way in me. I sit for a moment getting use to the stretch feeling of him inside me. Then I lift myself and drop myself back down, he closes his eyes lets his head fall back against the headboard. I work myself on his dick watching his face, the easy smile on his face. I could do this all day if it keeps him looking like that. He rock up into me I lean forward warp my arms around his neck and press my face against his neck. He shoves in hard smashing into that spot, I shudder hard clap down around him. He grabs my ass takes control of my motions, I let him he grunts and tries to push up faster I sit back get a grip on his shoulder and set the pace. His eyes close, his hold on my ass tightness, I bit my lip, close my eyes and turn just so, fuck. He squeezes my ass hard and I know he’s closes, I rock harder clamp my ass tight.  
“Fuck fuck.”  
He comes inside me, I ride out his orgasm. He leans forward to kiss me; his hand warps around my dick. He licks into my mouth, his hand jerks me fast and hard, I come whimpering into his mouth.  
I lay on my side feeling fucked open and sleepy. Tommy pushing against me slides his arm around my waist.  
“You fucked up the sheets.”  
I laugh and run a finger down his arm.  
“You change them to soon.”  
“I’m changing them again.”  
“Fine, sleep with me for while.”  
He presses his face against the curve of my shoulder and I know that’s yes. So I close my eyes and breathe.

 

Then

We develop a rhythm. Running in the morning, breakfast together, we spend most of the day apart he goes to work, I go to work, schedule don’t always match. Most nights I hang out in my room or on the computer, he disappears off on his own. It takes three months for us to spend a whole day together. We don’t talk much but I realized half way through lunch that we are talking, than I can’t stop hearing him, can’t stop talking back. I’ve never spoken so much to anyone without saying a word. The next week I have a Sunday off and we spend it doing nothing together. On Monday I go to work and request ever Sunday off. He never worked weekends. He doesn’t question it when the next Sunday after our run instead of pulling out the milk and cereal I dig around in the cabinets for pot and pans. I take eggs out the fridge, he moves around me and takes out peppers. I look around and see what we have and decide on French toast. When I move to put cinnamon in the batter he makes a face and snatches it away. I laugh and make it without cinnamon. We eat scrabble eggs and French toast leaning against the breakfast isle. I look up from my plate and find him watching me. He has a stain just there above his mouth. I reach out and wipe it off. He doesn’t look away. I lift the finger and put it in my mouth. I don’t know why I did it. That was a lie,I know why I did it. I wanted to know what he tasted like. He watches me suck my finger and smiles a slow greedy thing that knots up my stomach and makes my dick jump. After breakfast we clean up the kitchen together and go take showers. I jerk off in the shower thinking about that greedy smirk on his face, the taste of his dick on my tongue. When I get out the shower he is already moving around in his room the door is open which is a new thing, a week old. I dress in sweats and go down the hall to his room. I lean against the doorway watching him change the sheets on his bed. He looks up and gives me a look than goes back to changing his sheets. I know that mean I’m allowed in, so I cross the room and move to sit on his window seat. I tuck my feet under me and watch him finish up on the bed put the dirty sheets in the laundry bin. When he’s done he comes to stand in front of me, reaches out run a finger down the bridge of my nose, over my jaw. He pulls me to my feet we go to the living room and watch TV, eat lunch, and play a video game. The phone rings he ignores it, lets it go to voice mail. We lay around and listen to his sitter in law talk about him coming over to visiting next weekend. We go out for dinner.

I lie in my bed and jerk off, I try to make it last. I know he is watching me but I keep my eyes close, slid my legs further apart, slip another finger into my hole. I bit my lip hard enough to draw blood. There is no way I can make this last. I open my eyes and see him silhouetted in the doorway. I come in a mess all over my stomach and hand. He licks his lips and walks away. I roll on my side and catch my breath.  
It takes a week for him to come into the room to stand next to my bed and jerk off on my face. I lay there unmoving listening to his unsteady breath, he leave the room I wipe my face off, wipe down my stomach and legs pull the covers over me and go to sleep. By the end of the month we don’t talk about it but he has moved to sitting on my bed his fingers buried in my ass as I jerk myself off.

 

It’s a Thursday in the seventh month when I come home from work and find Brandon sitting in the living room. I drop my bag on the ground and sit down in the chair across from him.  
“Tommy isn’t here.”  
He gives me a tight smile. Brandon is weary of me I like that about him, that he doesn’t fully trust me with his brother.  
“I’m here to talk to you.”  
“Okay.”  
He gives me a look shakes his head there’s a smile on his face.  
“You’re like him but complete different. I’m beginning to think you are good for him.”  
I nod “I’ll take that. Why are you here?”  
“Tomorrow is the anniversary of the day his platoon died the day, Manny died he takes it’s hard. I thought you should know so you’re not shocked tomorrow when he turns in to a beast.”  
“Thank you.”  
“You’re welcome. Next weekend when Tommy comes over for dinner Tess insists you have to come too.”  
“I’ll come.”  
He stands. “I’ll see you next weekend.”  
“Okay.  
“I’ll let myself out.”  
He leaves the room. I take out my cell phone and call my boss. I call out for tomorrow, my boss isn’t happy but I tell him I can’t make it. I shower and get in bed I try to wait up for Tommy.

I wake up to cursing. I roll over look at the clock it’s 4 am. I get out of bed stumble into the hallway the light is on in Tommy room. I head down the hall the door is ajar, I push it all the way open, he’s standing in the middle of the room, bottle in one hand lamp in the other, he sends the lamp crashing to the floor glass shattering everywhere.  
“Tommy what’s wrong.”  
He turns to look at me eyes blazing, I swallow hard and walk further into the room trying to avoid the glass on the floor.  
He lifts a hand pointing towards the door.“Go back to bed.”  
“I can’t.”  
“Go.”  
I move closer to him he doesn’t move so I close the space between us reaching out to take the bottle from him, he clings to it, I press my hand to his chest, he lets the bottle go. I lift the bottle to my mouth and take a swing, than another, he watches me eyes narrowed. He grabs hold of my hip, pulls me forward. I fall against him let him force his way into my mouth the bottle falls out of my hand, I lose all sense, all I know is the feeling of his tongue in my mouth, his chest pressed against mine, his hand heavy and warm on my hip.  
He pulls away.“Go back to your room.”  
I shake my head, he squeezes my hip hard. “This isn’t going to be good.”  
“I want it.”  
He drags me in for another bruising kiss. He leads me to the bed pushing me back against the pillow yank off my pants, I pull him down on top of me welcoming the feel of his weight, it’s been three long months of wanting. He sucks had on my neck, licks my collarbone, sucks on the skin above my nipple, bites hard on my nipple rolls it between his teeth, moves lower nips at my stomach, dips his tongue in my navel, sucks hard on my hip bone, ignores my dick, pushes my legs apart, leaves bit marks on the inside of my thighs, pushes my legs wider, leaning in between my spread my ass cheeks and presses his face there, sniffs, puts his tongue just there, rubbing against the rim of my asshole. I tug hard on his hair he moves back looks me over and climbs off the bed. He yanks off his shirt, kicks off his pants, opens a drawer and come back to bed with lube and a condom. He slides on a condom. He is watching me with that focused look, like I’m all he sees.  
“I don’t want to play.”  
“Okay.”  
He lubes up two fingers, slides them in, works me open, adds another, doesn’t take long, his fingers slide out my hole, he lifts my leg and move in between my thighs, one hand griping my thigh, the other guiding his dick into me. I bit my lip, closes my eyes tight, there a slow burning heat, he pushes forward rocking his hips slowly forward until he is ball deep inside me, I sigh, loving the feeling of being absolute full, he gives me half a second before he's moving, jerking deep and hard inside me I grab hold of my dick, he feels too big inside me, too wide, too long. He drags my leg over his shoulder pull the other to wrap around his waist and the angle changes, he smash into that spot and my world goes white white white, I’m gasping for breath, hand moving on my dick, he keeps it there just hitting that spot, my back arches off the bed my toes curl, I’m trying to breath, I come so hard I see spots, he rocks into me keeps on fucking me I'm coming and dying and coming. He shifts enough to let up, I catch my breath rock my hip up meet his thrust. He fucks me hard and deep, for him it's not enough. He slips out of me rolls me over shoves a pillow under me and drag my ass up. He shove back in to me, I press my face into my arm and take it. He slips out of me cursing, he pulls off the condom and tosses it on the floor. I roll over. He is sitting at the edge of the bed face pressed into his hands.  
“What’s wrong.” I keep my voice at a whisper.  
“I can’t.”  
I move to sit behind him pulling him back to rest against me. I kiss his shoulder, run a hand down his back turn his head so I can kiss his mouth.  
“I want you to come inside me, please Tommy.”  
He looks at me eyes wide and gone. I kiss him because I want him here with me. It's a moment before he kisses back pushing me back into the bed. I run my hand over his face  
“Tommy can you do that for me let me feel you.”  
He groans and pushes my legs apart. I gasp into his mouth as he slides back into me rocking his hips. I press a kiss to his mouth.  
“That is it baby fuck me I want it so bad.”  
I warp my legs around his waist push down into his thrust.  
“Only you make me want it like this.”  
He kisses me, sucks on my bottom lip, he speeds up breath coming fast, I run my nails down his back arch up into his thrush.  
“Please baby I want it so bad.”  
He growls, slamming into me, then he’s coming a warm gush inside me. I close my eyes breath in, warp my hand around the back of his neck and pull him down for a kiss. He slips out of me shifting us so he can reach down between us, slips his finger into me, pushing in, than pulling out. I drag his hand upward, pull out the kiss to take his come covered finger into my mouth, he is watching me eyes wide, I smile around his finger. He rubs his finger over my tongue I suck harder.  
“God Mark.”  
He pulls his finger out my mouth replaces it with his tongue. We roll together on the bed, he pushes me on to my stomach and stretch out next to me pressing kisses on my back. I fall sleep.  
I wake an hour later and stumble to the bathroom on my way back to bed I step on glass.  
“Fuck.”  
He sits up. “What happen?”  
“I got a splinter in my foot, I think possible more than one.”  
He helps me limp to the bed. He lifts my foot in his hand and looks at it.  
“You got a few in there.”  
He leaves the bed. Clean up the glass and comes back with a tweezers and alcohols. He plucks the splitter out and pours alcohol over my foot it burns like a filthy bitch. He kisses the sole of my foot and rests it on the bed.  
“You're all good now.”  
“You could kiss it again.”  
He smirks and rests the tweezers and alcohol on the nightstand. I push my foot into his lap. He lifts my foot, kisses the heel, licks the arch, sucks on each toe. I close my eyes and force myself not to grab my dick. I open them to find him watching me his fingers rub slowly over the arch in my foot.  
“You're not what I expected Mark Bradford.”  
“Shut up and come here.”  
He drops my foot and moves up the bed I pull him between my legs and kiss him because I can.  
We sleep for awhile I wake up to him curled on his side fist clinched grinding his teeth. I shake him, he lashes out his fist colliding with my chest. It hurt like a bitch. I hold down his arm and pinch him hard he comes awake, jerks upward glaring.  
"What the fuck."  
"You punched me"  
He rubs a hand over his face. I let go of his arm. He looks at me  
"You shouldn't sleep next to me."  
"Shut up."  
He looks at the red bruise on my chest, presses his hand against it. "Sometime I get violent when I sleep."  
"Sometime I scream."  
He pulls his hand away, shove off the sheet and gets out of bed. He walks out the room. I pull my knees up to my chest. He comes back with a bottle of Jack.  
"Seriously it's not even 7 am."  
"It’s that kind of day."  
He drops back into the bed, takes a long swing offers me the bottle I take it. He leans forward and presses a kiss to my chest right over the bruise. I take a swallow and hand the bottle back.  
I stretch out next to him pillowing my head on his shoulder.  
He speaks into my hair. "I have to make a call."  
I kiss his shoulder. "Later, it's still really early."  
He drinks, ever now and then I drink too. We watch the sun come up.  
We fall back to sleep. Tommy is not in bed when I get up the clock says it's after 12. I pull on pants and go in search of him. I find him in the kitchen the phone resting face down on the counter next to a bottle of Stoli. He sits on the breakfast isle looking at them.  
"Did you call her?"  
"Ya I called her."  
"Everything okay?"  
"As good as it gets."  
I open the fridge and look around for something fast to make. I settle on sandwiches. He watches me make four sandwiches and set them on a plate. I grab the chips from the cabinet. I rest the plate and chips next to Tommy. I grab a sandwich and hop up the next to him.  
"I'm not hungry"  
"You need to eat something to absorb all the alcohol in your system."  
"You don't have to take care of me."  
I put a hand on the back of his neck. "I want to."  
He snorts but picks up a sandwich. I take a bite of my sandwich. We eat in silence, he doesn't shake off my hand so I leave it there, fingers stroking the top of his spine. I let him eat 3 of the four sandwiches and most of the chips. When we are done he jumps down and cleans up the mess. I tuck my feet under me and watch him move around the kitchen.  
"Do you want to go somewhere or do something?"  
"No."  
"We can't just drink all day."  
He smirks at me tosses the rag in the sink and walks across the kitchen to where I sit.  
"We can do stuff."  
I laugh drape my arms around his neck "We could but not all day."  
He gives my arm a squeeze. "The day is half gone."  
"Okay lets go to bed."  
"Shower first."  
"Shower it is."  
I let him pull me down into his arms. We strip and get in the bathtub in his bathroom which is huge. He wants to shower, I want a bath because I haven't had one in ages. He give in, lets the tub fill. He gets in first I settle between his legs, my back to his chest, his chin resting on my shoulder. I tangle my hand with his and rest them against my stomach.  
"It shouldn't be this easy." He speaks directly into my ear voice pitched low in the near silent room.  
"It not easy Tommy just simple."  
He doesn't respond. I turn my head press a kiss to his temple.  
He gets bored with the bath. I drain the tub, he turns on the shower. I let him scrub me down. I press kisses into his skin, his fingers linger where they press against my skin. By the time we are done in the shower I'm hard as a rock. I drag him to the room shoving away the towel he tries to dry me with. I push him on to the bed.  
"We need to have sex now."  
He laughs and that is the best sound I've heard all day. I swallow his laugh, drape myself over his body, he runs his hands down my back griping my ass. I pull out the kiss.  
"Fucking now please."  
He rolls me on my back and makes the world go bright.  
We sleep and wake and fuck and sleep. When I wake it 4 am and I have work in a few hours Tommy is asleep a frown on his face. I press a kiss to his chest. He grunts in his sleep. I run my hand over his hair. He turns on his side and comes awake.  
"Time."  
"After 4"  
"Turn off the light and sleep."  
I turn off the lamp and curl up next to him letting him warp himself around me.

Now  
I dress in shorts, t shirt, flip flops and a baseball cap. When I go downstairs to find Tommy is sitting on the sofa watching TV.  
"We need to leave now"  
He looks at me turn off the TV and stands. I let us out the house locking the door behind us.  
When we get to Tess and Brandon house Tommy is shutting down. It’s not an obvious thing but I know this is going to be a trial. I knock on the door. Tommy stand beside me watching the ground, hands shoved in the front pocket of his jeans. Tess opens the door smiling and waves us in. I let her pull me into a hug. She moves in to hug Tommy he steps back giving her a small tight smile.  
Her smile dims. "I'm glad you guys could make it"  
"We are glad to be here."  
"Everyone is in the backyard."  
"Give us a second."  
Tess nods gives my arm a squeeze and heads out back. I turn to Tommy. He meets my gaze his eyes are still focused so I know he is not completely gone on me. I move closer rest my hand on his hip.  
"We okay"  
He bends into my touch I lean in and press a kiss to his mouth, he grab my hand lacing our fingers together, kisses me back hard and I know he’s okay for now. I let him lead us to the backyard.  
Emily and Rose are happy to see him. He put on a smile and lets them hug him. He is jumpy but he plays with them sits at their little tea table and drinks ice tea out of little pink tea cups. I help Brandon grill, Tess works on a salad. We sit down at the wood table under the tree and eat an early dinner. The girls talk over each other trying to get Tommy attention they don't see him enough, when they do they always get over excited. After dinner we head inside to watch a game on TV the girls run around playing a game only they understand.  
It after 8 when we take our leave the girls are starting to crash and Tommy is about to creak.  
His hands shake when he hands me the keys to the car. I drive us home.  
I pull into our driveway; he sits in the passenger seat forehead pressed against the window breathing deep. I turn of the engine. We sit in the car. Tommy sits up eyes still close.  
"There is nothing I could have done to save them, I did all I could do, I tell myself this."  
"And it doesn't make you feel any better but you have to keep telling yourself that."  
He reaches across the space between us and takes my hand turning it over, he traces the lines of my palm, eyes still close.  
"I think about them every day. I think about Manny every hour. I think about my mom and pops and fucking Jesus Christ and I question, me, why me out of everyone why me."  
"Because it was you, I'm glad it was you."  
He opens his eyes turn to look at me. "Because you’re a selfish bastard, glad to be alive."  
"Dame right and I'm glad to have you."  
I cling to his hand. We sit for a while longer in the silence of the car. He lets my hand go opens the door and steps out. I follow him up to the house. He goes to the kitchen, I hear the fridge open and close. I kick off my flip flops and head to the kitchen, he is sit on the counter drinking a beer. I’m glad it’s a beer and not the hard stuff we keep on top shelf of the cabinet.  
"You me and a game of tag"  
He snorts.  
"It’s dark out hardly any moon."  
"And what pussy."  
He hops of the counter takes another sip of beer and offers me the bottle, it’s half empty I drink the rest toss the bottle in the trash.  
He gives me a smirk and pokes me in the cheek.  
"You’re it"  
He takes off for the backyard, I follow. It starts raining in the middle of our private game of tag. When we stumble into the kitchen an hour later we are cover in mud and dirty he pushes me up against the counter and kisses me hard and greedy, I slip my hands under his shirt settle my hands against his chilled skin.  
"Bed." I press the word against the skin of his neck.  
"Ya let me just get another beer."  
He pulls away from me.  
I push away from the counter and head up to our room I strip toss the clothes into the laundry bin. I'm in the shower when he comes into the room. I left the bathroom door open so I hear his cursing.  
"Tommy come take a shower"  
"I'll be there"  
I am done washing my hair when he steps into the shower. He picks up the soap. I step aside to let him get under the water this close I can smell it on his breath.  
"That's not a beer."  
He says nothing just ducks his head under the water. I wash up and get out the shower. The bottle is sitting on the night stand I lift it take a sip pull on sweats and fall into bed. He’s in there a long time. I'm half asleep when the water goes off. He comes into the room takes a swing from the bottle moves away from the bed, moves off somewhere I can’t see from where I lay on my side. The light goes off the bed dips. I wake myself up and flip on my back. He is sitting back resting against the headboard drinking.  
"Today wasn't so bad"  
He grunts presses a hand to my forehead.  
"Okay."  
He says nothing his hand just slips back into my hair. I close my eyes.

Than  
I hate my job it an unfortunate truth the worst part of the day is the 8 hours I spend stocking sneakers, saleing sneakers, counting sneaker, talking about sneaker. No one at my job is particular horrible, nor are the particular interesting. I hand a kid a pair of new Nikes, he smiles and walk off to the register. My day is over. I go to the back room and grab my bag. When I come back out to the front of the store Tommy is standing in front a display of running shoes hands in the pocket of his hoddie.  
"Why are you here?"  
He picks up a pair of bright green Adidas."These are ugly"  
"I actually like them"  
He looks at the sneakers in his hand than at me. "You have pretty bad taste in shoes."  
"They are fun, put them down I want to get out of here."  
I can feel some of my coworkers watching me, I never talk about myself. I've worked here 11 months and I know almost everyone history, all they know about me is I'm from Tennessee, I was in the military and I live with my boyfriend. Tommy looks around the store.  
"Why the rush."  
"Ass hole"  
I grab his hand and pull him towards the door. We step out in to the afternoon sun, he doesn't let go of my hand just shift our hands till our fingers are interlocked.  
"You had a reason for coming to pick me up from work."  
"Do I need a reason?"  
"Yes" I match my pace to his.  
"I was thinking you could use a new job"  
"Really I was thinking the same things  
He gives a look, I give him my bright happy smile, he smirks his eyes sliding away from mine.  
"Frank’s front desk guy left to reenlist, you want the job"  
"Work at the gym of a renounce UFC fight coach, no Tommy I want to stay at footlocker"  
"I told him we'd come by today so he can meet you."  
"Did you bring me real clothes."  
"It’s a fucking gym Mark I don't think he gives a shit that you’re wearing zebra stripes."  
"Fuck you."  
He stops in front his car, drops my hand and walk around to the drive side. He opens the door, I slide in the passenger seat tossing my book bag in the back seat.  
"I was thinking I should take classes at the local college or something."  
He pulls the car in to late afternoon traffic.  
"Or you could cash in one of you scholarships and go to a good school."  
"I can't, you won't move with me"  
His head whips to the side he give me a serious what the fuck look.  
"Traffic Tommy, how about you don't kill us."  
He turns back to the road. He pulls us to a stop in a park lot. "Explain"  
"Well you are my boyfriend right and I suck at long distances relationships, me and my girlfriend lasted 2 months after I join the corp. All the school are in other cities if I accept any of them I would have to move, that’s what going to college means, you have to go to them."  
He is frowning down at the steering wheel. "Why would I factor into your long term plan?"  
"Because you do."  
He looks at me eyes super focused. "Don't be stupid and tell me you love me because you don't Mark"  
"Fine I don't, we are done talking. I'm just telling you I'm sign up for classes. Drive."  
He looks at me trying to say things I don't want to hear. I look out the window cross my arms across my chest. Eventual he starts the car. We ride the rest of the way in angry silence. When we get to Frank’s gym he parks and get out the car. He walks in without waiting for me and this is why I avoid any talk of long term with Tommy Conlon.  
When I get into the gym he is talking to his brother who gives me a smile and a wave. I smile and wave back. When I get close enough I can tell Tommy is still high strung, his back is pulled tight he is ducking his head down. He walks off leaving me alone with Brandon who watches him walk away.  
"Are you two fighting?"  
"No I want to talk about being with him, he prefers to think I'm on vacation and someday soon I'm going to walk off back to my real life."  
He nods. "You ready to meet Frank."  
I nod.  
He smiles "He's a good guy you have nothing to worry about."  
He leds me off to meet Frank who is oddly intense in a very still way. He gives me the job no questions asked, I start next week. I leave Brandon and Frank in the office and go find Tommy.  
He is beating the punching bag into shape. I slide down the wall and watch him. He has been in a few fights since I moved in with him. He never seems to care much about them but I know they mean something to him, on the door of his closet there are small marks, every time he wins a fight he adds another mark. It’s one of a million things I want to ask and know I can't, not yet, not till I've proven myself. I nod of lean against the wall.  
I wake up to Tommy patting my cheek, he is crouched down in front of me his hoddie on.  
I rub a hand over my face "Are we leaving?"  
He offers me a hand helps pull me to my feet, I shake my head to clear it. He doesn't let go of my hand just lead us out of the gym.

When we get home I stretch out on the sofa and fall back to sleep. When I wake up an hour has pasted and I smell something good. I stand stretch and follow the smell to the kitchen. Tommy sits on the counter frowning down at a book.  
"What are we eating?"  
"Food"  
"Ass hole"  
I move in between his spread legs, he leans down presses a kiss to my mouth. I take his book from his hands turning it so I can read the cover. "Moby Dick"  
"It’s about struggle"  
"I know what's it’s about I just never though you would read it."  
He shrugs and pushes me back so he can hop off the counter and go turn off the stove. I rest the book on the counter, he takes the food out the oven. We eat. I open the book to the last page read the last line than open it to the first page and start reading. It not an easy read but the words are put together well. I carry the book upstairs and stretch out on the bed. Tommy moves around the room.  
"You’re reading my book."  
I look up from the book to find him watching me from the end of the bed.  
"I'm interested."  
He crawls on the bed and take the book from my hands. "Get your own"  
"We can read together."  
"I'm ahead of you."  
He stretchs out on his stomach pillowing his head on one arm, I lay next to him my head resting on his back. I could ask him to read out loud and he would but he would hate it.

Now  
I ignore my ringing phone. My mom wants me to come home she thinks it’s time I start planning for the rest of my life. I don't know how she came to this conclusion but she’s been calling all week offering me long term planning advice. I close my textbook and watch the dog prance around the stage. I always wanted a dog but my mom was allergic so we couldn't have one. The dog show was pretty stupid but the dogs where all cute. I turn the volume up so I can hear what is being said about the husky on the screen. My cell vibrate I look at the screen voice mail. I drop it back on the sofa. A husky would be the perfect dog to get. I shut off the TV and hop off the sofa. I open the front door. Tommy is washing his car wear cut offs and flip flop, I love when he washes the car. He looks up as I come barreling out the house.  
"We should get a dog"  
"Why"  
"Because I always wanted one and a husky would be perfect"  
He gives me that look that means he think I'm a bit soft in the head.  
"You can get a dog."  
"But it can live in your house right."  
He shakes his head and goes back to scrubbing the hood of the car. "It can live in the backyard."  
"Can I get one now"  
"How about you go read up on it."  
“You’re right, I’m going to the office to do so some research dinner on you.”  
He nods doesn't look up from the hood of the car. I head to the office.  
I accidentally answer my phone in the middle of eating dinner. I am sitting at the computer desk research the best kind of dog food , Tommy is in the living room watching all the godfather movies. I shove a fork full of pasta and cheese into my mouth, my phone rings I answer.  
"Mark"  
"Mom"  
"You've been avoiding me"  
"Yes obviously very much yes we are not talking about where I will be in five years."  
"You are only getting older."  
"Thanks mom"  
"Honey you are going to be quarter of a century in 10 months it’s time you start thinking about what you want from life.  
"I have a job, I'm in school, I have a boyfriend and I'm getting a dog what more do you want for me mom."  
"You’re getting a dog"  
"Yes a husky. It going to be awesome"  
"Dogs are a lot of work."  
"You just told me I need to be responsible"  
She is quiet, a soft over stuffed silence that dig into me.  
"Mark"  
"Yes mom."  
"I want you to be happy."  
"I am happy"  
"Three years and you have never brought this man home. You've been home 6 times and never once have you even considered bringing him home, how can I take your life with him seriously."  
"Mom it’s not like that, Tommy is just not good at social stuff."  
"We are your family."  
"He's is my family too, mom I love him this is long term, he is who I want to be with in 5 ,10, 60 years."  
She is quiet again I can see her in my minds eyes, frowning down at the sink, lower lip caught between her teeth as she tries to understand, to deal, she spent weeks like that after I told her I was joining the corp.  
"I'm happy mom and I love you so I will ask Tommy if he wants to come home with me"  
"Okay."  
"Okay"  
"If you get a dog it’s not invited"  
"I figured it wouldn't be. I'll talk to you soon."  
"You bet your pants you will. I love you to bits Mark."  
"Me too mom, tell dad and Matthew hi."  
"I will bye"  
"Bye"  
I hang up and head for the living room. Tommy is stretched out on the sofa, empty plate on the coffee table, a beer in hand.  
"My mom wants you to come home with me."  
"No"  
"Why, don't say because I have too many family members"  
"It’s true"  
"I've never even asked and now I'm begging she doesn't believe we are real because she thinks I'm making you up."  
He snorts and takes a sip of his beer. "You’re asking for a lot today Marky, dogs and family trips"  
I sit on his legs, he sits up and wrestles me till I'm laying on my back and he is stretched out on top me.  
"Say yes."  
"I'm not saying no"  
I wiggle till he lets me up. We resettle with my head on his shoulder, our legs tangled together. I’m not saying no in Tommy speak for yes.

 

Later  
I hate the idea of leave Irish for a week but my mom made it clear the dog was not invited. I crouch done and rub his head he licks my face. I scratch behind his ear he pants joyful and glad. I’m going to miss my dog. Tommy comes out the house carrying bags  
“Are you going to help me with this shit.”  
“I’m saying good bye to our dog.”  
He tosses our bags in the back of the car and whistles, Irish bounces over to him the traitorous little dog loves him more. He rubs Irish‘s head and opens the back door. Irish hops right in, he closes the door.  
“Go get his stuff, we have to get to the airport.”  
I go back inside and grab Irish’s bag full of toys and treats. Brandon and Tess had volunteered to watch him for the week we would be spending in Tennessee. The girls wanted a dog and they thought this would be the perfect test. I give my house a once over and head out side. I put the bag in the back and get in the passenger seat. I am not even strapped in when Tommy gets the car moving. By the time we get to Brandon and Tess place I consider not leaving Irish, just taking him with us.  
“What if we come back and he is wearing a bow and has his claws painted pink, those girls really like pink.”  
Tommy shrugs and get out the car.  
“Tommy this is serious.”  
I get out the car he ignores me. I walk up the lane to the house. I buzz the doorbell. Tommy opens the back car door, grabs Irish’s bag, take hold of his leash and leads him out the car. Irish barks and lets Tommy lead him toward me. The door opens Brandon stands there smiling. Tommy hands him the bag and leash.  
“Take carry of our dog.”  
Brandon smile. “Of course have fun with the in law.”  
Tommy snorts, waves and walk off back to the car. Brandon gives me a look.  
I sigh. “Thanks for watching him, call me if he gives you any trouble.”  
“I’m sure he’ll be fine Mark. Call me if Tommy gives you any trouble.”  
I turn to where Tommy is once again sitting behind the wheel of his car.  
“I think in his own way he’s looking forward to this.”  
“Scaring your mother yes I think he is.”  
I snort Brandon pulls me into a hug.  
“Have fun.”  
“I’ll try.”  
I walk back to the car slide into the passenger seat.

I am half asleep my face press against Tommy shoulder his hand tangled in mine I always end up sleeping on the plane. Tommy is not helping at all with the rub of my hand and his even soothing breathing. I try to shift, to wake myself up; Tommy presses a kiss to my forehead.  
“Go to sleep Mark.”  
‘We are going to be together in 50 year.”  
He laughs and gives my hand a squeeze, which in Tommy speaks mean of course stupid, so I let myself relaxes. The feeling of his hand warm in mine, the sound of his breathing lulls me to sleep.  
9/11-11


End file.
